I Write Because Buzzfeed Says So

I Write Because Buzzfeed Says So

“That is perhaps the greatest parody of journalism that I have ever seen.” – Julia Sugarbaker

When did I know I was going to be a writer? Was it that summer day in 1994 I wrote a poem for no real reason at all? No. The winter day in 2008 I wrote the first page of Straightville? Nada. The day in 2012 when all this happened? Nope!

The first time I ever actually knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I was destined to be a writer was when this well-crafted, scientifically sound Buzzfeed quiz told me to be one.

So that settles it then.

I mean, these things are based on science, folks. They don’t just pick careers out of thin air! They dig deep and ask the tough questions…like on what would I spend my tax refund and what’s my favorite social network. By the time that question surfaced, I knew sh*t had gotten real. Not that I had doubts before then. The images of Uncle Scrooge and Spongebob Squarepants in hipster glasses sold me on the science pretty early on.

All in all, I can feel gosh-darn confident that this whole writing thing is no fluke.

But, wait now. These Buzzfeed guys are realists. They know not everybody is going to make it in this business. So they offered up some backup jobs: director, producer and advertiser, namely.

And that merely served to increase my sureness that this is the incontrovertible real deal. My day job does involve a bit of advertising, and I ran a (public access) TV show for several years.

So, like, I am definitely on the right track, you guys. I mean, how could you not have total blind faith in a site that also gave us this

There you have it, dear readers. I feel so validated.

(Okay, okay. In all seriousness, it probably was this day.)

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